Look left, look right, it’s there: a society of violence

By Sandra Nneoma Ibegbulem

Photograph by Sandra Nneoma Ibegbulem

Violence seems to be eating deep into our everyday lives.

Look left, look right. It’s there, staring back at you.

It appears basically in everything we do. When we are talking to someone, in a bus, or at work. Trying to take it out of our lives has become a huge concern.

The Nigeria 2016 Crime and Safety Report: Lagos showed that crime remained a critical issue in Lagos for all nationals residing there.

Having seen violence appear in his everyday community, Lagos local Gbemiga Ogundeko saw it as a form of anger and a way of expressing that rage.

“Violence is an extreme form of aggression resulting from frustration or anger,” he said.

“As a matter of fact, aggression and violence relate together; and this is typical in our day to day lives.”

The Nigerian said that violence can also be found in our homes; in the sense that violence is now gradually becoming a part of us.

According to a 2016 report by the Domestic Violence and Abuse Resource Centre 28 percent of all women – a third of all women in Nigeria – have experienced physical violence.

Gbemiga stated a very typical example.

“Those of us that take public transport to our destinations; you notice whenever some conductors want to get their money or the passengers want to get their change, it’s always through insult, curses, or abuses,” he said.

“It affects us physically, psychologically, and emotionally; and we tend to have bad relationships afterward.”

It is a well-known fact that violence affects us negatively. In society, it gives people wrong vibes about us. In our homes, it makes our loved ones far from us because they don’t want to get hurt or can’t handle us.

Husbands hurt wives, mothers to children. It continues to spread from homes to the streets.

How do we stop violence from getting deeper into us?

It is commonly thought that a person exhibits violence only when they think it’s right.

In a society where violence is perceived as normal, a husband who beats his wife regularly would occasionally send a message to his male child/children that beating a stubborn woman will bring her to her senses. At the same time, sending a message to his female child/children that men are evil and they need to learn one or two means of defense for future purpose.

One of the most violent acts seen in society today is between drivers – owners of both public and private cars. They go to the extent of beating each other on the road simply because one car smashed the other.

Gbemiga stated his thoughts on how to prevent violence.

“Charity begins at home…violence begins at home…,” he said.

About

Gbemiga Ogundeko is a local from Lagos, Nigeria. He is a transaction processing officer for Credit Direct Limited. Gbemiga is concern about the amount of violence in his country and saw it as a topic he is passionate about, aiming to see more efforts in solving this issue.